Decided to create a new blog to pen down my more matured thoughts (supposedly?) for a new beginning.

He's now at the airport, probably surrounded by relatives, bugging him to take care, eat well, sleep well, etc. I'm supposed to be there, am I not? But I can't. Not under such circumstances, not when I'm in such a complicated and confusing status. I have declared myself single. The word is "declared". No official or proper break-ups yet. Just silently drifting apart...No way i'm gonna let it die down like this. Shall find a proper time & place to talk. I believe deep down in our hearts, its not going to work anymore. Despite those talks and periods of trying...and trying...i guess the both of us are just drained out. Nothing is gonna be the same anymore.

He just called. I'm not sure how am i going to survive for the next 6 mths. Well, at least a 6 wks wait doesn't sound too bad to me, but after Sept i'll probably be dead. I'll be flying to BKK in 6 weeks time!! I can't wait!!! Looking soooo forward to this wonderful trip....with no worries, no familiar faces, no restrictions....we can just be ourselves there!

I shall curl up in my bed, wipe off my tears, and wait for his call tomorrow afternoon. I'm already missing him so so much.....that my heart aches....so badly....



~mE~